“Rich Man Will Fly Woman Places If She’s Willing to Act Pleasantly Surprised Every Time She Sees His Penis: https://t.co/R7dmaJTEPW”

Portland’s new police chief was on ‘Wheel of Fortune' in 1996. The entire episode is online. https://t.co/hNhmRC1u5D (by @edercampuzano)— Everton Bailey Jr. (@EvertonBailey) October 5, 2017

The latest Tweets from Señor Eder Campuzano 🇲🇽🇺🇸 ❄️🎄☃️🎒 ✏️ (@edercampuzano). Friendly neighborhood education reporter @Oregonian. Views expressed here are my own. He/Him. 503.221.4344. 📧: ecampuzano@oregonian.com. Portland, OR

Danielle Outlaw went home with $40,000.

every single day is the longest weirdest day— Molly Lambert 🦔 (@mollylambert) October 6, 2017

I'm gonna have to buy two bottles of rose and get SLOSSSSHDD4DAYS w nana instead :/— adhd excuse 101 (@abbylovescoffee) October 6, 2017

I miss being SLOSHED https://t.co/jQ8dxUGfAz— adhd excuse 101 (@abbylovescoffee) October 6, 2017

SLOSHED.— David Blue ※ (𝙶 𝚄 𝚁 𝚄 𝙼𝙾𝙳𝙴) (@NeoYokel) October 6, 2017

pic.twitter.com/5jQCIymj7S— Ashley B Williams (@Grumpyfck) October 5, 2017

pic.twitter.com/5jQCIymj7S— Ashley B Williams (@Grumpyfck) October 5, 2017

i see an astolfo pic on the TL and start vibrating so rapidly i produce a high pitched ringing— samantha 🦷 (@goblin_sorcerer) October 6, 2017

actually what's worse is i have a skeleton of a plot and no idea how i'm gonna fill it up— Ammnontet! (@ammnontet) October 6, 2017

the worst part about writing a book is i feel like i'm spoiling it for myself as i plan the plot out— Ammnontet! (@ammnontet) October 6, 2017

To declare something ORE ROTUNDO—literally, ‘with a round mouth’—is to speak in a full voice.— Haggard Hawks 🦅 (@HaggardHawks) October 6, 2017

2 bros chillin on the toilet 5 ft apart cause they’re not gay https://t.co/Q4f4QRAYJc— festive mandy (@hotchilitofu) October 4, 2017