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Me, showing the cashier my 0% off coupon

mfs on here be like My sincere apologies for any mistakes I make with English, it is the 18th language I've learned,

mfs on here be like My sincere apologies for any mistakes I make with English, it is the 18th language I've learned,

they're giving out game awards cards instead of cards related to the winter sale, and there isn't even any new profile themes or items for the sale 💀 come on now https://t.co/Ix54Jm8XXp

I want to see a tweet (really a reply) get 0 views. Absolutely no attention. That would be ideal

I want to see a tweet (really a reply) get 0 views. Absolutely no attention. That would be ideal

Happy to know that Spring 4 is the Best App Update Runner-Up of MacStories Selects 2022. Thank you so much for your support, and I can’t wait to share more info about Mona the Mastodon client with you soon. https://t.co/a7YhNEYekh

Just made a December 2022 post on r/Shortcuts to (hopefully) help out new members / users https://t.co/TcnCIo104L #shortcuts #apple #appleshortcuts #ios

the new public views thing is interesting. bizarre to discover that people actually see my tweets

the new public views thing is interesting. bizarre to discover that people actually see my tweets

Just made a December 2022 post on r/Shortcuts to (hopefully) help out new members / users https://t.co/TcnCIo104L #shortcuts #apple #appleshortcuts #ios

Saying God bless has become a sort of a vocal stim for me atm. My cat will meow at me and ill meow back like “meowmeowmeow! God bless!”

"Silence, inflation." https://t.co/PBdxJXImEn

Literally like 3 or 4 more scenes left to write I'm going to puke (Positive connotation) I'm going to throw up (Positive connotation) I feel like I'm going to suddenly and mysteriously die at any second (Positive connotation)

@raywongy @inversedotcom Scribe. You record yourself doing something and it turns that recording into a step by step tutorial that you can send to, say, your grandma. https://t.co/fzhzYO7Cvk

five thousand people sent him a heart

https://t.co/EimEii41nX

abilities: - can stab self with a needle twice a week - decent ideas about media - crying really hard - beam attack

Hi friends! I'm working on @inversedotcom's "Best tech of 2022" — these are the very best hardware, software, services released *this* year I've already got a list of 20-ish devices that made the cut, but I wanna consider more in case I missed something. Drop your picks and why!

drinking one beer - you're in the clear drinking beers two - watch out... fool

"Loss leader" being canonized as a Real Business Thing kicks so much ass. The fucking rascal who sat down in front of a bunch of pissed-off old investors and said "Losing all this money is actually my plan to MAKE money" deserves to keep his nicest tie when he joins them in hell.

🚨 new rocker alert 🚨 just came across a guy on tinder whose profile just says “bassboarding.” i immediately thought, what’s that but didn’t have to wonder too much because every photo features him skateboarding with a bass guitar in hand

"why is this business still operating at a massive loss after 10 years" Look. You seem like a sly old cat. Surely you've seen someone clipping coupons down at the bingo hall. This is the exact same thing. Just on a bigger scale. I swear bro. Just give me more money

whenever i open the letterboxed app to log the fact that i watched all 3 maze runner movies in a row the list of Top Movies makes me feel like something is corroding through my stomach. i dont understand the brain you must have to willingly choose to watch shit called Aftersun

@cosmepl they should have an option for "watched with a custom soundtrack"

There are other ways to be "The Best" beyond specs or price

@raywongy @inversedotcom Pixel buds pro. Hands down best earbuds I've ever used!

*taps the sign, sobbing* https://t.co/WxWZbwD0VP

*dials harder* https://t.co/RqvIx0Fx4s

You wanna get rid of me you're gonna have to kill me