would https://t.co/YUdIn6ylf6

given name vs taken name

white people flirting be like “good heavens Geoffrey your cranberry sauce is divine”

https://t.co/wtQhwLOt05

People are saying “this will affect the metaverse”. Wrong. This will not affect the metaverse in any way https://t.co/7rGal3DxGp

Banana smoothie

We need trains that work https://t.co/2nv1d9RdaR

https://t.co/P6n42pMkyv

How did you add value this Thanksgiving?

Just leaving this here for #BlackFriday #dimspirations https://t.co/JuC6OwvDJB https://t.co/iS9kEObRbc

i mean that hardly bodes well https://t.co/sl7GdBFwTv

@kfaraday This one is my absolute favorite https://t.co/tbpMbUpsTW

https://t.co/HMYe5OrgPw

Cool gift that @lux_elite got me for my birthday. https://t.co/jf2MHxOK3u

Arab insult: "Why don't you go crawl back inside your mother's vagina, oh sorry it's because it's home to a gang of raccoons" Chinese insult: "...Ghost."

China, I love you, but please think of some insults other than "ghost"

Optimist: The glass is ½ full. Pessimist: The glass is ½ empty. LaTexist: The glass is $\frac{1}{2}$.

Indy my two year old refusing to go further.

Macy's parade NFTs, christ...

I made this. Let me know if still interested.

If the Grinch went to Juilliard

My girl: “You’re gonna love my dad. Don’t be shy. He’s a really nice guy” The dad: https://t.co/Sj41qTdpMy

@friendshapedcar https://t.co/LbonJfxIdv

Elon Musk brings >green text to Twitter: report

👀 https://t.co/kdzhV89y7S

1986 Lancia Y10 4WD https://t.co/Vm4r8lwIti

Buckingham palace more like bucket hat palace... Get fucked dude

Voting is now open for the MacStories Selects 2022 Readers' Choice award 🏆 @ClubMacStories members: link to submit your vote is in today's issue of MacStories Weekly https://t.co/m7sr6d8TIt https://t.co/F5Y9zzoUHp

https://t.co/rtzDJrjHzo

I don't think there's ever been a song that made me cry that wasn't like 3 country songs that's about it