Put a pill in a McFlurry, I'm goofy/ oomfie, acting for the cameras, it's a movie

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Your girl listens to Meg Thee Stallion once and starts texting me

- knows how the order of operations works.

It’s pretty wild to see @1Password on demo devices in @Apple stores. 🤯 https://t.co/wVgIXVzGYZ

Finny's Ladder - Finny https://t.co/PZCZXzN0jT

Bro this is how Missouri paid for our educational system and if you wanna know how that ended up just look at how fucked up I turned out https://t.co/WIjalmVXop

15 minutes till the program starts on @datafruits. Here's our track list. And yes, your kidney money's going towards paying for my titty skittles. Grab your shitty malt liquor and join the chat: https://t.co/8qk0q1ANE5 https://t.co/DcOtRZdsb9 https://t.co/0vixsoPW5N

Just made my 1st grade students fill out a form where they answered which other student in the class they would gay marry

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love them https://t.co/LSKTaM1oKc

making a new friend on textnow https://t.co/9Mr5ambo34

You heard the lady. The Jazz Program is back on the air in two hours on @datafruits. Show starts at 9 PM MST (11 EST/8 PST). Tune in or we take your kidneys and use them to buy out-of-print Keith Jarrett records and estrogen pills. Or Four Loko. I haven't decided yet. https://t.co/6hE2x5quen

Dudes rock. 📷: @_cheymac https://t.co/w64urrakhk

now is a really good time to listen to disabled people

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nice https://t.co/iYta31VXBG

ah yes.. Higher picture quality https://t.co/NGnrVNfHfI

listening to REAL music https://t.co/jdnPo9b2ZQ

#VMUShare https://t.co/FbzUzYos1c

When a ninja turtle gets knocked out its called shell shock

ah, yes, iOS artificial intelligence. my favorite dish: eyeballs https://t.co/yAx4IAUcXw

Highlights - Zake https://t.co/ghWhefDkIt

Nissan S15 Silvia https://t.co/xIiXb3oMJ6

@friendshapedcar The Subaru Brat and the friend shaped hatch, the Subaru Justy https://t.co/FWhQykUPQo

i love being the president and rotating a nuclear missile in my mind all day

just when I thought I’d heard it all https://t.co/IcaFwnAU1K