It’s now estimated that perception may be up to 90 percent based on memory; barely 10 percent of what we think we’re seeing is the result of stimuli outside the body in the present moment. In order to process huge amounts of visual information, the brain relies on memories of prior experience. Color is not only a wonder of the natural world but something inside us, as Wittgenstein hinted. Following Goethe, whose 1810 Theory of Colours inspired Wittgenstein’s investigation, “If the eye were not sunny, how could we perceive light?” Our memories of experiences, like photographs, may seem to represent the past, but they also shape how we see the present and the future.

You’re bipolar type 2: agitated without necessarily being euphoric, but sometimes also seductive, flirtatious, very sexual, outwardly very much alive, but inclined to make the type of decisions you regret the most, while being dead sure that they’re right and that you’ll never go back on them. Then after that you’re dead sure of the very opposite, you realise that you’ve done the worst thing possible, you try to fix it and do something even worse. You think one thing and then its opposite, you do one thing and then its opposite, in frightening succession. But the worst is that if you’re like me and are used to analysing yourself, once the diagnosis has been reached and the mood swings identified, you gain hindsight – only this hindsight is of little use. Or if it is, it’s just to see that no matter what you think, say or do, you can’t trust yourself because there are two of you in the same person, and those two are enemies.

in the definition of bipolar disorder, the pole opposite the dive into depression isn’t necessarily a state of spectacular euphoria and disinhibition that leads to social suicide and often to suicide itself, but just as frequently what psychiatrists call hypomania, which means in plain language that you act like a fool, but not to the same extent.

Angst bestaat uit drie fasen. Denk aan een antilope en een roofdier dat het op haar gemunt heeft. Op open plekken is de antilope behoedzaam, ook al is er niet meteen een roofdier te zien. Ze zet haar aandacht heel breed en speurt de omgeving af. Er bekruipt haar een onbehagelijk gevoel. Dat noemen we angst. Als het roofdier plots opduikt, dan gaat dat over in vrees. Dan is de antilope daar volledig op gefocust. Ze kan aan niets anders meer denken dan aan het acute gevaar. Valt het roofdier aan, dan komen we bij paniek. Dan is het alle hens aan dek. Een antilope zal met haar bekende bokkensprongen wegduiken in de hoop het roofdier te slim af te zijn.

73 percent of Americans prescribed antidepressants don’t even have a diagnosis of depression

pills are often easier and cheaper: It can be hard for people to access therapy because there aren’t enough providers, and mental health treatments often aren’t fully covered by insurance.

one out of eight Americans over 18