“However, I think this is more a case of accommodation rather than intended design. Group chat is simply a series of free pipes distributed via an app for you to send images and text through. ‘You’ as a group get to decide what is ok, normal, and expected to be shared. Rarely is it ever an explicit ‘decision’.”
“I know someone who tracks contacting friends in OmniFocus – which sounds almost callous at first blush, but really strike me as a deep expression of caring”
“@purpleyay @not_unambitious I know someone who tracks contacting friends in OmniFocus – which sounds almost callous at first blush, but really strike me as a deep expression of caring”
“What if birthdays were a time of sharing the impact the person has had on you, or noticing changes in them they might not be aware of themselves.”
“So since it's my birthday, please answer one of these prompts: “What's your favorite memory of me?” “What an impact I've had on you that you haven't shared with me?” “What's the biggest change you've seen in me since you first met me (or in the last year)?””
Melissa Mesku is a software engineer, entrepreneur, writer and editor in New York City. She holds a teaching certificate from Cambridge and graduated magna cum laude from UC Berkeley.
i dont think twitter lacks "complex discussions" because of its UX design, but because it's a deeply gamified platform that functions on metrics. only certain discussions are possible when everyone is keeping score https://t.co/MFFrw8FNHx— nathanjurgenson (@nathanjurgenson) February 18, 2019
“The fact that you can fool yourself, for the most part, into thinking that you have done something really valuable with your time is really dangerous.”
“The friends that I keep close make me the best version of myself, but I’ve never found that consistently in a romantic relationship. I’m growing to understand that romance and love are not rational (thank you, therapy?). Historically, I’ve looked at romantic relationships as a test of what I have to offer. Do you like me? What are the qualities about me that you like? You’re having fun, right? What I’m getting at is this — I know I’m a good friend. I can evaluate friendships rationally, articulately. But with relationships or dating there’s this factor of capital-F Feelings added to the picture. They’re weird and messy. The butterflies-in-your-chest feeling is foreign, like anxiety rather than attraction. I’m not comfortable with capital-F Feelings yet. Because most of my past relationships have been maybe not in the absence of Feelings, but not formed on them alone. So I’m working through these things.”
