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THE FOUNDER OF THE MONSTROUS PATH Untamed novel translation

A report of a minor but inexplicable misfortune brings Wei Wuxian and a troop of six young Lans to a small town. Yet while an outing with their favourite teacher is as enjoyable as always, the juniors are disappointed with the results of their investigation; nothing out of the ordinary seems to be happening. That is, until the arrival of their other favourite teacher. Wei Wuxian is rather happy to see him, too. He missed him. *** Their investigation progresses, sometimes along unexpected paths.

"Zewu-Jun. You once told me about a house surrounded by gentians, where you visited once a month, and how Lan Zhan still waited there, even when the door no longer opened." Xichen feels light-headed. He feels shocked, and angry. He has never told anyone such a thing, but Lan Zhan is giving Xichen a look of utter betrayal. "You told him?" Lan Zhan whispers. "When?" Wei Wuxian takes Lan Zhan's hand. "About twenty years from now." Wei Wuxian starts again from the beginning.

Being an account of the Green Witch, the Fallen Star, known also as Captain Jade Hasegawa, Federal Worlds Starfleet Ranger, who crash-landed in the North of Westeros in the year 298 AC and what she did there afterwards. Feudal lords, ancient aliens, terrible threats and snarky heroics: all in a day's work for the Starfleet Rangers.

Reluctantly, Wei Wuxian comes back to the Cloud Recesses only to realize his feelings for Lan Wangji extend beyond their friendship. But Lan Wangji's heart seems to belong to Mo Xuanyu because it's impossible he recognized the soul inhabiting his body is Wei Ying's, isn't it?

Power is being drained all over the USS Yunmeng. Meng Yao is struggling to control his emotions. There's a stowaway. These things are related. Lan Sizhui is desperate to make sure no one finds out why. The crew of the USS Yunmeng are distracted anyway. It seems like every time Lan Xichen smiles at Meng Yao a different couple gets together.

When the entire cultivation world turns against Wei WuXian, Jiang Cheng comes up with a plan to save him and arranges a marriage between his brother and the Second Jade of Lan, Lan WangJi.

The Wen refugees in the Burial Mounds settlement survive, but it was always going to be a struggle. Wei WuXian lives with the dead as much as he does with the living, but even in the deep shadows, there is the potential for joy.

Jiang Cheng raised a hand, his head still throbbing, and guided no small amount of energy into his palm. His right hand glowed purple, but the level of cultivation was significantly weaker than what he was used to. Then the door burst open. “Jiang Cheng! Sleeping in is supposed to be my thing, you know—” Jiang Cheng stared in horror at this teenage Wei Wuxian. He was running his mouth again—what was new—but it seemed like a distant memory or dream to be witnessing this young version of Wei Ying. He was still garbed in the purple of the Yunmengjiang Sect, rather than red and black. The face itself was unfamiliar, as Jiang Cheng had already gotten used to Mo Xuanyu’s boyish prettiness, and seeing Wei Wuxian’s classically handsome features reformed into the face of his younger self was somewhat traumatizing.

Later, when he’s older, it’s this that A-Yuan will remember most: the stretch of silence, the two of them both dirty and shaking with fever, as he looked at Brother Rich, and Brother Rich looked back at him.

“Wei Ying?” Lan Wangji said, a small frown furrowing his brows. “Dead body,” Wei Wuxian blurted out, pulling back and turning away to hide his embarrassment at having been caught staring into Lan Wangji’s eyes. “Yeah, Jiang Cheng and I dropped by the morgue before we came here. Wait.” He turned back to Lan Wangji, eyes wide. “Is this--” He lowered his voice, and continued in a discreet whisper. “Did your ghost senses tingle?” --- Dead bodies have been turning up, eyes scratched out and tongues chewed off. While investigating, Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng make some new friends, make some new enemies, and remain hopelessly dense despite being the precinct's best detectives.

Wei Wuxian separates his life, without noticing, into three chapters. Some days, they’re hard to look at, hard to read, harder to know he wrote all of them himself. Some of the words are in blood.

It was weeks later, after reflecting about the consequences and possibilities, after reflecting about his regrets, after saying his goodbyes… that Lan Wangji returned to Qinghe. “How far back do you think the array will allow us to travel?” Nie Huaisang asked him as they made their preparations. For once, it was Lan Wangji who answered, “I don’t know.” (In which Nie Huaisang takes on a different approach.)

Essentially: LWJ's mom and WWX's mom ON THE RUN with THEIR KIDS. (...and also MY's mom. And any other goddamn moms who need help. Get in the fucking car, ladies, we're saving everybody) Because here's the thing: LWJ's mother was a cultivator who killed her future-husband's teacher. And I think we all have a pretty damn good idea what might have gone down to provoke that, and why the Lan menfolk never actually explain what precipitated this act of extreme violence, and thus we can probably take a stab at why a perhaps-newly-pregnant lady* might end up agreeing to a marriage of convenience with some guy she really wasn't into, who was determined to keep her locked up in a pleasant little prison in Gusu. And I'd like to say "aww, bless him, he saved his unrequited crush all selflessly like, even though they didn't then live together as husband and wife"....but he subsequently knocked her up with a second child. :/ The ladies in MDZS tend to have a pretty shitty time, so this fic is pulling a goddamn Fury Road and scooping them up and taking them off to form their own Ye Olde Themyscira-ish Rogue Sect of ladies looking out for other ladies. (*obvs this is my headcanon.)

Wei Wuxian was the most infamous street racer of his generation. They still speak of him now, the stuff of legend: the reckless abandon, the hair pin turns, midnight races over dangerous tracks. His death, racing through the streets of Nightless City with his sister in the passenger seat, the moment when his luck finally ran out. 10 years later, Mo Xuanyu enters his first street race.

“You may find Narnia a more savage place than you remember.” Trumpkin has never heard a silence so loud as this that follows his warning. The children glance at each other, crowding the air with a language he isn’t hearing. His skin prickles with it. He turns away from them, drawing his knife to begin skinning the wild bear. Only a moment later, the smaller, darker boy is drawing his own knife and dropping to his knees. Trumpkin looks at him sidelong, uncertain. “I’m a fair butcher,” King Edmund tells him mildly, and he plunges his arms in up to the elbows.

It was a very strange kind of luck, Wei Wuxian thought, to die and find yourself resurrected in the body of a character about to be murdered. Good luck or bad, he didn’t know, but he couldn’t deny it was interesting.

The Prince of Gusu is kidnapped for ransom. He’s saved by a nightmare made flesh. Or: A necromancer, his palace of bones, his long-lost husband, and the rise of their dark kingdom.

srsly tho what is jiang cheng thinking, staying single for 16 years? Lan Zhan I get, because he technically did acquire an heir pretty early on, which means Lan Xichen now has two presumptive heirs and is also off the hook for marrying right away. Jin Guangyao DID get married and produce an heir, even though it, uh, didn’t take, and Jin Ling was already first in line to inherit. But Jiang Cheng? is the LAST SURVIVING MEMBER OF THE IMMEDIATE JIANG FAMILY. Who’s even left?? Second cousins? People in the sect but not the clan? Jiang Cheng HAS to get married and have a kid. Politically keeping Jin Ling as his heir is a terrible idea, because Jin Ling is going to be the Jin Sect Leader, and if he also inherits Yunmeng that upsets the balance of power for all four sects. The Lans and Nies and everyone remaining in the Jiang sect have GOT to be constantly getting on Jiang Cheng’s ass about having a kid. EVERY CULTIVATION CONFERENCE FOR THE LAST SIXTEEN YEARS it’s a topic of discussion. There are always dancing girls! They always pay Jiang Cheng Special Favors! Sometimes beloved aristocrat daughters show up naked in his bed! everyone’s just like “WE DON’T CARE IF IT’S A JIN GUANGYAO SITUATION, PLEASE, SECT LEADER JIANG, YOU’RE GIVING EVERYONE ULCERS WITH YOUR ANGRY CELIBACY” but Jiang Cheng is legitimately too fucking sad to consider it, and doesn’t realize he’s too fucking sad to consider it. he just finds a fatal flaw in every single woman he’s presented with, and is too careful to sire any illegitimate children. He also thinks everyone is panicking and overreacting because there’s plenty of time. No one’s getting on Huiasang for staying unmarried. (This is because Huaisang hasn’t been sect-leader for the full sixteen years, and also because Huaisang secretly puts it about that he pays a woman in Qinghe money every month, and everyone thinks it means he’s taking care of one of Mingjue’s bastards, and that if he doesn’t have an heir himself he’ll acknowledge it.) anyway at the first cultivation conference after Lan Wangji is made chief cultivator, the annual question of Will Sect Leader Jiang Get Married Already, Please, He’s Not Getting Any Younger comes up, and then Jiang Cheng shocks everybody by saying that he formally acknowledges Wei Wuxian as his brother and the first disciple and therefore heir apparent of Jiang-Yunmeng, and so can everyone get off his ass about marriage already jiang cheng has not informed wei wuxian of this. he hasn’t seen wei wuxian since guanyin temple. a vein pulses in lan zhan’s forehead with fury. jiang cheng sees no problem with any of this. huaisang thinks it’s very funny.

i know i wouldnt survive in an austen novel because someone would be britishly, discretely rude to me and i would be completely unable to restrain myself from calling them a cunt to their face --- my detested rival: why, madam, you look so drawn and pale today! does the small size of your estate not give you enough freedom to take in the sun? me: listen you waxy, lemon-faced bitch,, --- Rich, eccentric, elderly widow Lady peering over at the conversation: That one. That one shall be my heir.

Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian make out in a room full of Sect Leaders, Jiang Cheng tearfully declares his love for his estranged brother, Sect Leaders Yao and Ouyang beg for the Yiling Patriarch’s forgiveness, and Lan Qiren openly welcomes a new nephew-in-law into his family. None of them want to be doing any of this. Thanks to the Juniors, they don’t exactly have a choice. (Or, wherein the Juniors accidentally write a cursed fanfiction, and everyone has to reenact their parts in it, or potentially cease to exist).

collection of yarns in cat colors. Cute for friend who likes knitting

as much as the concept of Jesus being a fairly normal lad has its charms, im personally very intrigued by the idea of him being just… extremely weird. not even in a mystical sense, just…….staggeringly BIZZARRE. you go to the well to get some water, and here’s Miriam’s boy, staring at the sky, completely still. his expression is unreadable. you hazard a hello and ask how he’s doing, and he slowly, unblinkingly, lowers his gaze on you (he’s 8 and is missing his frontal teeth, not that this is making you any less uncomfortable) and says “I cannot speak of the state of my being, Nathan son of Saul, my brother, but rejoice for the water you shall take today will be as pure as the soul of the children of Heaven” …you start sweating --- normal person in 1st century Nazareth: making my way downtown, walking fast *sees J boy, 8 yo, staring at you from across the street* normal person: walking faster --- even funnier, the only person 100% on board with his Prophetic Kid Talk is his mother Miriam, an otherwise placid, absolutely normal woman around 25 or so kid JC, coming home at twilight, a single white dove following him and chirping with weirdly human-like precision: moth̫́er,̦͌ ̮̉i h͙̉av͔̽e ͓͗b̘̃r̞̓o̮͘u̲̒gh̟͒t̺́ you a do̗͐ṽ͙e̢͘ ͈̾m͒͢a͈̽dē̝ ỏ̘f ͈̓c̆͜l͔̂aỷ͇ aṋ̑d̳̿ g͢͞i̹̾fted̖͡ ̻͐it ͓͂w̖̿it̎͜h t̥̃h͙͒e ̨̒m̧̂i̡̍ŗ͒â̫cḷ̔è̤ ̛̻of̞̅ l̘̈i̛̦fè̳ Miriam: ! that’s my little boy :) now let’s go get ready for dinner :) her husband Yosef, a carpenter who only marginally got signed up for this:

Lan Wangji should refuse. He should. He looks back down at the mask. Beneath it is the soft creamy paper of the invitation. He could present this at the door and slip into the palace and— “Go see him, Wangji,” Lan Xichen says quietly, and Lan Wangji feels his resolve crumble beneath him. A very loose Cinderella AU, featuring Lan Wangji as Cinderella, Wei Wuxian as Prince Charming, Lan Xichen as fairy godmother, the forehead ribbon as glass slipper, and GusuLan bedtime as midnight.

Most shows with overpowered supernatural characters always try to come up with elaborate excuses to explain why the characters can’t just magic themselves out of every situation. Good Omens doesn’t really do that, but you don’t really question it because you completely buy that these morons are so unequivocally incompetent that they straight up forget that they have the powers of fucking demigods. They’re like high-level d&d characters who only use the same three moves and have completely forgotten about the 73 magic items sitting in their inventory. --- Crowley: I was totally planning on teleporting to this galaxy 4.3 light-years away but then you died and I was sad :( Aziraphale: Oh I’m sorry. But listen, I need you to go to this village about an hour outside of London Crowley: You Want me to GO WHere?? How the– how the FUuuck am I supposed to- I can’t Drive, it’s Rush Hour! You want me to WaLK?? In the Rain??! Please, be Realistic.

actually when I was in 8th grade and obsessed with twilight my master plan as a twilight vampire was to sit around in famous shipwrecks like the super deep ones where they can only send robots with cameras from their submarines and when they sent one down i’d be sitting there, pretending to drink out of an old tea cup you know for the drama of it all and the guys in the submarine would know what they saw and that it was real footage but who else would believe them? no one important. but it didn’t stop there. at the next party they threw to celebrate one of their latest finds, some museum-y banquet idk I was 13, I was going to show up. I was going to show up and make eye contact with them one at a time from across the room and they were going to lose their goddamn minds and then before the volturi could catch wind i was gonna be back in the ocean. how could they find me? the drama. the theatrics. i can’t believe i didn’t realize i was gay right then but that’s another story, also involving vampires. --- hate to burst your fantasy, but 1) vampires don’t show up in film 2) vampires can’t cross moving water much less sit at the bottom of the ocean --- you’ve got me a in a difficult position here because on the one hand, this post is specifically about vampire lore in Twilight, so you’re wrong, but on the other hand, saying “you clearly didn’t read twilight” doesn’t exactly make you look like the bad guy here

hilarious vine compilation

All witches are selfish, the Queen had said. Tiffany's Third Thought said: Then turn selfishness into a weapon! Make all things yours! Make other lives and hopes and dreams yours! Protect them! Save them! Bring them into the sheepfold! Walk the gale for them! Keep away the wolf! My dreams! My brother! My family! My land! My world! How dare you try to take these things because they are mine! I have a duty! -- Terry Pratchett, Tiffany Aching

It took almost three years to fuck everything up with Lan Zhan.

Wei Ying is beautiful in a tight, black t-shirt and black nitrile gloves, face half-hidden behind a surgical mask, and hair escaping his messy bun in all directions. He has stepped out of his workroom briefly to greet Lan WangJi and tell him that he's finishing up his last customer of the day. The sunset flooding in through the front door is bonfire orange and lights him up, making him squint, burnishing his face and adding copper highlights to his hair. Lan WangJi wants to pull him close, feel his warmth, kiss him, and fall asleep to the sound of his voice. He wants to bring Wei Ying home with him. Really, he just wants to make a home with Wei Ying. He takes a seat and waits his turn for some of Wei Ying's time.