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How Bad Habits Are Formed (Unconsciously)
How Bad Habits Are Formed (Unconsciously)
I think she enjoys treating her boyfriend like a chore because her relationship with her parents acclimated her to the feeling of being depended on. She likes the feeling of parenting and babying someone because her child-self had to do that to stay on her parents’ good side. In other words, her psyche felt like, in order to keep her parents’ love and protection, she needed to turn herself into a caretaker, going above and beyond what she knows she should be doing.
Patterns that are formed out of necessity in an earlier stage of life determine what you look for for the rest of your life. The behaviors you were forced to do when you were younger become the behaviors you itch to do when you’re older.
Like making a tie-dye T-shirt, the twists and turns of childhood shape the way we’re colored as adults.
·sherryning.com·
How Bad Habits Are Formed (Unconsciously)
The Free-Time Gender Gap - Gender Equity Policy Institute (GEPI)
The Free-Time Gender Gap - Gender Equity Policy Institute (GEPI)
Women spend twice as much time as men, on average, on childcare and household work. All groups experience a free-time gender gap, with women having 13% less free time than men, on average. Mothers spend 2.3X as much time as fathers on the essential and unpaid work of taking care of home and family Young women (18-24) experience one of the largest free-time gender gaps, having 20% less free time than men their age Working women spend 2X as many hours per week as working men on childcare and household work combined Mothers who work part-time spend 3.8X as much time on childcare and household work as fathers who work part-time Married women without children spend 2.3X as much time as their male counterparts on household work Among Latinos, mothers spend more than 3.6X as much time as fathers taking care of children and doing household work
The unequal division of unpaid work in the home, such as cooking, cleaning, and shopping for food and clothing, is a powerful testament to the tenacity of old gender norms. Women do significantly more of this work than men do, even when there are no children living in the home. This holds true for women regardless of their marital status, their employment status, or their level of education.
Among all adults without children, women do twice as much household work as men, dedicating 12.3 hours per week to these tasks, on average, compared to 6 hours for men. Similarly, among all single people without children, women do nearly twice as much household work as men, spending 10.6 hours per week on household tasks compared to 5.7 hours for men.
getting married seems to exacerbate the burden of household work on women. Married women do substantially more household work than their single women peers, while married men spend just a few minutes a day more than their single peers. Married women without children do 2.3 times as much household work as their male counterparts (14.3 hours per week versus 6.2 hours).
Working women spend significantly more time than working men on unpaid work in the home. This is the case whether they work full-time or part-time. It is the case whether they have children or not. Take household work like cooking, laundry, and the like. Women who work full-time do 1.8 times as much as men who work full-time; they spend 9.7 hours per week on it compared to 5.4 hours for men. Women who work part-time do 2.5 times as much household work as men who work part-time.
Across every group studied, men spend more time than women socializing, watching sports or playing video games, or doing similar activities to relax or have fun. Women overall have 13% less free time than men, on average. The gap balloons among some groups, with women having up to one-quarter less free time than men.
Women overall have 13% less free time than men, on average. The gap balloons among some groups, with women having up to nearly one-quarter less free time than men.
there is a wide gulf between our ideals and our realities, as we have seen in this report on how Americans divide the work of taking care of home and family. One reason for the persistence of these gender disparities is that the U.S. has failed to modernize its public policies to fit 21st century economic realities. Even though 78% of American women are in the labor force, the nation’s social infrastructure is still largely premised on the assumption that mothers will be at home with children.
Every high-income nation in the world provides for paid leave for new parents—except the United States. Most provide ample financial and institutional support for childcare and preschool. Our peers devote a substantial share of public spending to family benefits, but the U.S. invests only minimally in supporting families. For instance, family benefits account for 2.4% of GDP in Germany compared to 0.6% in the United States.
Even when young children enter school, typical American school hours are grossly misaligned with the workday, forcing families to either spend money on after school care or reduce their work hours.
Public policy alone will not entirely eliminate these deeply rooted gender disparities. Cultural change is needed too. But smart policy can nudge along positive behavioral change that ultimately advances equity and equality. For example, several countries include mechanisms in their family policy to encourage fathers to take paid parent leave. Many Nordic nations have a ‘use it or lose it’ provision for fathers. Other countries, like Canada, provide extra paid weeks of leave to families if both parents use the time.
The unequal division of care work, particularly, affects women’s opportunity and well-being in ways that cannot be measured solely in dollars and cents.
One way Americans deal with the housing affordability crisis is to move to distant suburbs and exurbs, where housing is cheaper than it is in central cities and job hubs. The tradeoff, however, is typically a long commute to and from work. But for women who are caring for children or elderly relatives, long commutes are often not feasible. Children and elderly parents get sick and need to get to doctors in the middle of a workday. School hours begin too late and end too early to accommodate a commute to a 9-to-5 job.
when schools close due to climate-driven events, mothers might have to take unpaid time off of work or pay for childcare. As Americans experience more dangerous heat waves, wildfires, and floods driven by climate change, the caregiving demands on women can increase, as they are more likely to be the ones responsible for helping children and elderly adults stay out of harm’s way.
·thegepi.org·
The Free-Time Gender Gap - Gender Equity Policy Institute (GEPI)
Part 1: How To Be An Adult— Kegan’s Theory of Adult Development
Part 1: How To Be An Adult— Kegan’s Theory of Adult Development
Robert Kegan's theory of adult development proposes that adults go through 5 developmental stages. Becoming an 'adult' means transitioning to higher stages of development, which involves developing an independent sense of self, gaining traits associated with wisdom and social maturity, and becoming more self-aware and in control of one's behavior and relationships. However, most adults never progress past Stage 3, lacking a fully independent sense of self. Progressing requires a "subject-object shift" where one's beliefs, emotions, and behaviors become observable and controllable, rather than subjective forces.
When we’re older, religion becomes more objective — i.e. I’m no longer my beliefs. I am now a human WITH beliefs who can step back, reflect on and decide what to believe in.
Stage 1 — Impulsive mind (early childhood)Stage 2 — Imperial mind (adolescence, 6% of adult population)Stage 3 — Socialized mind (58% of the adult population)Stage 4 — Self-Authoring mind (35% of the adult population)Stage 5 — Self-Transforming mind (1% of the adult population)I focus on Stages 2–5, because they’re most applicable to adult development. Most of the time we’re in transition between stages and/or behave at different stages with different people (i.e. Stage 3 with a partner, Stage 4 with a coworker).
·medium.com·
Part 1: How To Be An Adult— Kegan’s Theory of Adult Development
Longitudinal Associations Between Parenting and Child Big Five Personality Traits
Longitudinal Associations Between Parenting and Child Big Five Personality Traits

The provided web page discusses a study on the longitudinal associations between parenting practices and child Big Five personality traits. Here are the key takeaways and findings from the content:

  1. Association Between Parenting and Child Personality:

    • Previous research has explored the associations between parenting and various child characteristics, but less has been done on the longitudinal associations with child Big Five personality traits.
    • Studies have shown both positive and non-significant associations between parental warmth and child personality traits.
  2. Longitudinal Analyses and Changes Over Time:

    • The study utilized longitudinal data with assessments at different grades (5, 6, 7, and 8).
    • Changes in parenting behaviors over time were observed, with a general trend of decreased parental involvement and structure as children entered adolescence.
  3. Measurement Invariance Tests:

    • Measurement invariance tests were conducted to ensure that changes in latent factors represented real changes in constructs rather than changes in relations between factors and indicators across time.
  4. Correlations and Effect Sizes:

    • The magnitudes of correlations between parenting variables and child personality were reported to be small, averaging around 0.05.
    • The study emphasized that small effect sizes should not be dismissed, and the associations were comparable to those found between other environmental factors and child personality.
  5. Practical Implications:

    • The study suggested that the small and non-significant associations should not discourage research on parenting interventions. Modest changes in parenting and child personality, when multiplied by the population, can have meaningful effects.
  6. Changes in Child Personality Over Time:

    • As children got older, they became less conscientious and less open to experience, as indicated by negative slopes in the longitudinal analyses.
  7. Parenting and Child Personality Complexity:

    • The link between parenting and child personality was described as complex, transactional, and dynamic. The study considered theories like Social Learning Theory and Attachment Theory but highlighted the need for a nuanced understanding.
  8. Limitations and Future Directions:

    • The study acknowledged limitations, such as the small effect sizes and the complex nature of personality development. It emphasized the need to consider multiple environmental factors contributing to personality development.
  9. Contributions and Data Accessibility:

    • The authors highlighted contributions to the conception, design, acquisition, analysis, and interpretation of data by various individuals. The study's materials and data are accessible on the Open Science Framework.
  10. Conclusion:

    • Despite small effect sizes, the study suggests that understanding the association between parenting and child personality requires a nuanced approach, and interventions at the population level can still be meaningful.

Overall, the study contributes insights into the complex and dynamic relationship between parenting practices and child personality development, recognizing the importance of considering multiple factors and the potential impact of interventions.

·online.ucpress.edu·
Longitudinal Associations Between Parenting and Child Big Five Personality Traits
Why education is so difficult and contentious
Why education is so difficult and contentious
This article proposes to explain why education is so difficult and contentious by arguing that educational thinking draws on only three fundamental ideas&emdash;that of socializing the young, shaping the mind by a disciplined academic curriculum, and facilitating the development of students' potential. All educational positions are made up of various mixes of these ideas. The problems we face in education are due to the fact that each of these ideas is significantly flawed and also that each is incompatible in basic ways with the other two. Until we recognize these basic incompatibilities we will be unable adequately to respond to the problems we face.
·sfu.ca·
Why education is so difficult and contentious